This joke is another from Joyce and Roy Critchlow.
A farmer ordered a high-tech milking machine. The equipment arrived when his wife was out of town, and he decided to test it on himself first. He inserted his 'manhood' into the equipment, turned on the switch and everything else was automatic.
Finally, he decided to call the supplier's Customer Service Hot Line with his mobile phone. "Hello, I just bought a milking machine from your company. It works fantastic, but how do I remove it from the cow's udder?"
"Don't worry," replied the customer service rep, "The machine will release automatically once it's collected two gallons."